Fool me once...

This has been an interesting year. The earth has circled the sun again, I am slightly older than yesterday, and that makes me a little whiny and pensive. However! Not only do we need to move the f*ck on, but we also must learn from our mistakes. And so, I've put together a list of things 25 year old Vivian has learned, for better or for worse...

The words "skin care" and "sit-up regiment"are now part of my vernacular. Even if the words "I don't have any..." prefaces them. But the point is that I'm using the words, which is more than I can say for 24 year old Vivian.

I have learned the harsh reality that people have metabolisms, and are more and more at their mercy the older they get...

I've learned that a hyper-extended wrist injury is not (always) an invitation for a masturbation joke and giggling...

I've learned that SKIN DAMAGE IS REAL!!! Omgz...

I've learned odd words like "ergative verb" and "zero relative clause," and how to use them in a sentence to make me sound like a total douche...

I have really learned how easy it is to sound like a total douche...

I have learned that most people have absolutely no idea what the hell they're doing 95% of the time, and that they're usually faking it...

I have learned that airline companies must be run by sociopathic Scrooge McDuck-type millionaires who just wanna watch the world burn...

I have learned that hangovers DO NOT GET BETTER WITH AGE. For reals.

I have learned that no one wants to hear me b*tch about turning 26, especially since most of my friends are pushing 30, but I still do it anyways because I like complaining about stupid sh*t...

I STILL HAVEN'T LEARNED how bleach works, and still secretly think it has magical properties...

I still haven't (and probably never will) learn how to manage my time properly so that things aren't done minutes before their deadlines...

I am FULLY AWARE of the health hazards of smoking, thankyouverymuch, and am seriously considering maybe thinking of possibly quitting one day sometime soonish...

 I now know (after almost a decade of ignoring it) that certain household actions, such as not refilling the toilet paper, leaving empty ice trays in the freezer, or leaving a tablespoon of coffee in the pot, ARE TERRORIST-LIKE CRIMES AGAINST CIVILIZATION AND SHOULD NEVER BE TOLERATED.

There.

Now that that's all out of my system. Let's have a shameless photo dumb to cleanse the palate.

Behold... The weirdness...

Probably the creepiest thing I've seen in a while.

Oh look... another 711 is opening near my house. It'll go well with the other 5 convenience stores within a two km radius...

The view from my balcony

Mr. Sponge is SERIOUS.

Richard Gere being Richard Gere.

There's a joke in there, I just know it...

Throwback to Brisbane...

I... can't.

Face wipes for men. No homo.

A magazine dedicated to boys "Non-no"

This stunning piece of amazingness was left on the curb outside my home. Please note the white stain. Any takers?

Shinjuku!

This is just begging to be photoshopped.

Kumon.

Note the FACE.

My newest insomnia-cure. Worst. Course. Ever.

Yotsuya at night. Gotta love that light pollution.

Yoyogi roses.

The AKB48 girls are still selling phallic coffee...

Join his gym!

A totally-not-racist piece of construction equipment.

Smile!

Loving life!

I swear to God that train is looking at me...

No littering elephants! They're total dicks!

Demure...

 I think that'll do. Goodnight! Don't do anything I wouldn't do!